“Don’t ignore the friendship possibilities God has already put in your life in the name of waiting for that one perfect kindred spirit that may not exist. Embrace partial solutions, in this and in all of life this side of the veil.”
Good word. This hits me squarely between the eyes. The “kindred spirit” you were asking for in 2020 was basically *yourself*, right?! I’ve been cloning my perfect friend in my head for years but I’m sure God’s best for me includes someone whose strengths and weaknesses are different from mine. Thanks for putting this timeless/timely essay back out there ❤️
Haha, yes! I said that many times to Kyle — that basically I was looking for me. Which, if you think about it, probably wouldn’t be the ideal friend after all!
My husband and I were just talking about making friends as an adult last night! High school and college seemed designed to build deep friendships, and I don’t even really remember how I made those strong friendships then. They just happened because we were around each other all the time. Making friends as an adult just seems to take so much more effort, but it’s so worthwhile too! I love the ideas you have (and the emphasis on partial solutions) and will be sharing this essay with Chaz too!
Yes! And I think it’s especially hard in y’all’s season with itty-bitty children, because you’re so much more limited in time AND those college years/young adult years are so fresh in your mind still (you basically still feel like the same person, plus a few added years of wisdom). It’s really challenging.
If it’s any consolation — one of my partial solutions has been age, and I’ve come to learn that God has put folks like you guys in our lives even if we’re in different life stages!
I hit at least 3 (and a half?) of your 5 criteria and am hyperlocal to you at least on Tuesdays. ;) Let's be partially perfect friends! But only before 8pm, please.
I have been in a season of rebuilding and renovating some friendships for the last year or two, and it is hard, but sweet, work. The vulnerability that is required isn't something that comes naturally to me but when it resonates ("you feel that way TOO?") it's so worth it. Part of that has been pruning, which is also worth it. Quality over quantity.
I am grateful my friends are nothing like me. We wouldn’t last very long haha.
True girlfriends and couple friends are the best and take work. Grateful for answers to all of our friendship prayers and for him opening our eyes to see the friends who were there the whole time.
“True friends … take work.” Yes, for sure! I think that’s an earned-wisdom truth that comes with age and experience. I’ve come to realize this is definitely the case.
I’m so grateful to have a really big network of friends, some of whom are kindred spirits. Of these spirits most are totally different from me-on the outside at least-and yet something strong ties us together. It really does just take following that impulse to take the first step.
“Don’t ignore the friendship possibilities God has already put in your life in the name of waiting for that one perfect kindred spirit that may not exist. Embrace partial solutions, in this and in all of life this side of the veil.”
Good word. This hits me squarely between the eyes. The “kindred spirit” you were asking for in 2020 was basically *yourself*, right?! I’ve been cloning my perfect friend in my head for years but I’m sure God’s best for me includes someone whose strengths and weaknesses are different from mine. Thanks for putting this timeless/timely essay back out there ❤️
Haha, yes! I said that many times to Kyle — that basically I was looking for me. Which, if you think about it, probably wouldn’t be the ideal friend after all!
My husband and I were just talking about making friends as an adult last night! High school and college seemed designed to build deep friendships, and I don’t even really remember how I made those strong friendships then. They just happened because we were around each other all the time. Making friends as an adult just seems to take so much more effort, but it’s so worthwhile too! I love the ideas you have (and the emphasis on partial solutions) and will be sharing this essay with Chaz too!
Yes! And I think it’s especially hard in y’all’s season with itty-bitty children, because you’re so much more limited in time AND those college years/young adult years are so fresh in your mind still (you basically still feel like the same person, plus a few added years of wisdom). It’s really challenging.
If it’s any consolation — one of my partial solutions has been age, and I’ve come to learn that God has put folks like you guys in our lives even if we’re in different life stages!
I hit at least 3 (and a half?) of your 5 criteria and am hyperlocal to you at least on Tuesdays. ;) Let's be partially perfect friends! But only before 8pm, please.
I have been in a season of rebuilding and renovating some friendships for the last year or two, and it is hard, but sweet, work. The vulnerability that is required isn't something that comes naturally to me but when it resonates ("you feel that way TOO?") it's so worth it. Part of that has been pruning, which is also worth it. Quality over quantity.
Yes ma’am, to all of this! And yes to friendship before 8 pm. 😉
I am grateful my friends are nothing like me. We wouldn’t last very long haha.
True girlfriends and couple friends are the best and take work. Grateful for answers to all of our friendship prayers and for him opening our eyes to see the friends who were there the whole time.
“True friends … take work.” Yes, for sure! I think that’s an earned-wisdom truth that comes with age and experience. I’ve come to realize this is definitely the case.
I’m so grateful to have a really big network of friends, some of whom are kindred spirits. Of these spirits most are totally different from me-on the outside at least-and yet something strong ties us together. It really does just take following that impulse to take the first step.